When I replayed Fallout 4 recently, I reacquainted myself with one of the background characters—a noodle chef robot. All he can do is say “What will you have?” in Japanese and give you noodles when you say “yes.” It reminded me of early-days chatbots, which I miss on a personal level but decidedly not on a business level. Today’s chatbots aren’t like my pal Takahashi.